BE SELFISH
Did you expect this to be the first step?
I've learned that selfishness on this path may have you questioning if this is worth it, and it will more often than not happen when you are struggling or at a low point. Selfishness will make you feel guilty. It will also boost your confidence because you recognize the sacrifices you are making.
I believe this needs to be the first step because you need to focus on yourself and what you can do to get closer to your goal of earning that M.D.
When I say to be selfish I am saying to choose yourself over everybody else. I see this as a skill that will never get stronger with time. I recognize those are not the most comforting words to read, but if you're the type of person that wants to provide a lending hand to a friend in need or loves her family with all her heart or simply wants to have fun and socialize well then we both have a long road ahead of us.
The images and quotes below are pieces of advice and vulnerable moments that remind me of what it means to be selfish and the consequences (both positive and negative) of it.
Be as selfish as you can. If you crack – what happens to your family, what happens to your community?
- Dr. Diana Gutierrez
Be selfish. Embrace selfishness. Strive for it? My mentor shared these words to the left after I expressed feeling drained from the amount of emotional labor I had chosen to put in for people I cared about. I will be a doctor within the next seven years. I want to go into family medicine or pediatrics but, how can that happen she asked if I don't prioritize what will get me into medical school? She said you can't have it both. It's either your community or your one friend that is struggling. I still think about this often. How does that line of thinking make me feel?
Disappointed because I know she is right. Do I have to be selfish to reach a financially stable and life-fulfilling place? Can I be selfish and reach a financially stable and life-fulfilling place? Stay tuned.
This quote also comes from Dr. Gutierrez. Before I begin, there's a typo on the first line that should read "you cannot listen or focus."
I see her advice as a positive symptom of selfishness. There is both a short-term and long-term mindset that needs to happen simultaneously when navigating this journey, if not you'll get lost.
Dr. Gutierrez has made many sacrifices and overcame many obstacles. As she has learned to take one day at a time and recognize that she may have been on this race for longer than others, she also takes a step back and regains the appreciation for being on this race.
To take this advice a bit further, I constantly think about when she says "this is a beautiful journey." I laughed when I first read it and not because I thought it was a joke. How can something so stressful, emotionally draining, so hurtful to one's self-esteem, and exhaustive be a beautiful journey? At this very early stage of my life, I'm assuming the arrival to the destination makes the journey beautiful because it makes it all worth it. The irony behind the cost of the growth attained through this journey is what kills me every time. It's like a pendulum that I wish were only to stay at the center and not move. I'm constantly swaying from is it worth it? to of course it is worth it.